"I've been letting my mind wonder at night. My thoughts should have a curfew." Am Kidd

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Tears in the rain

For the past few years I've seen the slow journey of her mind try to leave her body. Her once watchful, alert eyes became vague, dreamy. Her once sure, determined steps became unsteady.  Her once clear voice became a whisper. Her once commanding, forceful attitude shifted, she was directed, supervised. I've watched this once beautiful woman shrivel, fade, evaporate, until she became a fragile shell. 

My mother passed away. In the still of the night, as she laid peacefully sleeping.  Her body has finally joined her mind.

The quiet lingering hope I've always carried that someday things would change between us can no longer live. On this rainy, dark morning, I grieve not only her death, but the death of the mother/daughter relationship I wish we'd had but never did.

I love you Mom